Similes swarm like flies

At the height of SOPAStrike, the simile stream was like a river. Passing the legislation would be

  • like using a sledgehammer instead of a scalpel.
  • like curing a sore throat with a guillotine.
  • like going after gophers with nuclear weapons.
  • like banning cars because robbers use them to escape the scene.
  • like the gestapo policing the Internet (validating Godwin’s Law).
  • like the Red Scare all over again.
  • like using cement to prevent teen pregnancy (which loses a little in the translation from Jon Stewart).

This list barely scratches the metaphorical surface. Time will tell which memes have staying power.

Wikipedia had barely gone un-black when the Megaupload shutdown hit the news.The FBI disgorged a list of allegations as long as your arm against Kim Dotcom and friends, but cries from those collaterally damaged arose almost immediately. To the “hundreds of thousands, possibly millions” of legitimate Megaupload users who’ve lost content, distribution channel, or both, the server seizure was

  • like killing schools of dolphin to catch 4 tuna.
  • like accusing a banker of fraud and impounding customers’ safe-deposit boxes.
  • like demolishing New York City because drugs and illegal weapons are being sold within its city limits.

Which brings us to today and my current best-of-breed, courtesy Bob Cringely:

  • like renting an apartment and coming home one day to find the police have locked you out and impounded your furniture because your landlord was operating an illegal poker game in the basement.

Like poetry.


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